What's your favourite Golem?

Always an easy filler for someone running a game; when an argument starts to get out of control with a particularly ardent player a GM can have the last word in may ways; my favourite rebuttal is always "Oh, you seem to hear heavy footsteps...". Actually its not often I have come across Golems but they are in post modern terms the 'tank' of an attacking or defending party. The principal idea is an entity made of a single material that is basically a huge hit point sink and often their size and mass leads to an overwhelming attack bonus also. This is all supposed to be balanced against a low or even mechanical level of intelligence and specific vulnerabilities inherent in their construction material. Additionally the basic or the literal commands they are given can cause them to exhibit odd and often amusing behaviour. They are great fun for some party bashing without having to think too much and often party members are in the mind-set of detailed planning and outwitting cunning opponents which can lead to misjudging events where brick shithouses are concerned.

 

 

In the last MERP, the party were rudely interrupted by a couple of stone golems attempting to retrieve an item stolen from their overwatch. By deftly jumping around a lot, out manoeuvring them, hitting them repetitively and a mage transmuting them using elemental spells, the party eventually returned them to the dust from whence they came. Touch and go for a bit as the Dwarf suffered a serious blow to his back.

 

 

Reminiscing on Golems of note I was originally enchanted as a child by the stop motion action of the 70s as pioneered by the late Ray Harryhausen. Despite the animations clear limitations his clever use of choreography did as comparable a job of immersing a viewer as the special effect itself. Great stuff. More recently, though arguably are the Angels from Dr Who which I have a fondness for and whilst I am worn very thin these days by the constant barrage of people in lycra hitting each other, The Thing could be considered as having a thick skin I think and also the rock monster from Galaxy Quest who just wants to be left alone.

 

As for best advice ?  Perhaps just stay very still and don't say anything..