Tuesday, 8 January 2019

Self Service Mortuaries

I love it when a plan doesn't come together. Whilst the games are starting to close now, there is always the feeling that someone will try and go off road at the last roundabout. A bit like a taking a child home from Disneyland, there can be a lot of kicking and screaming as well as occasional giant cuddly creature to contend with. The Planescape party is no exception and whilst I have to give credit to players that have been keeping 3rd level characters alive in the midst of fireballs, the last session has been a somewhat traditional English farce.

Having been asked to cremate a body and return the ashes as part of a portal spell component, our Planescape party have succeeded in precisely fifty percent of their objective, namely they have been wandering around town with a corpse. To be fair, its still quite fresh so there are no dogs following them at present and they did have to get out of a sticky situation quite quickly. Interestingly it's a dwarf's corpse which was fortunate as they did have an elvish cloak to wrap it in, rather than the other way around, so sort of posing as a Sigil Carpet Cleaning Company they were lucky that no one stopped them on their way home for a free sample.

The conversation then migrated toward the somewhat darker end of comedy as without a crematorium oven they were of course left debating whether to dismember the body and pop into a local bakery to finish the job or drop by a few Blacksmiths. They didn't consider a potters kiln as it happens but to be fair, floor space in Sigil is at such a premium, a luck check would be in order here. Never seen Dwarf as an optional topping on Dominoe's Pizza but they did decide to skip the local bread shops and appropriately enough return to the first plane of Hell to finish the job. No one tell the Monk.


  1. The best part about running a mortuary is all the free underpants.

  2. Never underestimate the benefit of free underpants - they can be sewn together to make a makeshift ship's sail, for example...


Note: only a member of this blog may post a comment.